When Bravo decided to shake up the cast of the Real Housewives of New Jersey for season six I’m sure they weren’t counting on finding someone quite like Amber Marchese! Straight-forward, educated, and outgoing are just a few of the traits that have made Amber such a great addition to the cast. Amber took the time this week to exclusively speak to us about her first season as a NJ housewife and throughout our conversation she struck me as a very real person. She was enthusiastic about sharing her experience, the good and the bad, and was open about her feelings towards her castmates as well as the drama on the show. Her blunt honesty was refreshing – especially in the world of reality TV where facts and truths can easily become fabricated. She didn’t hold back as she opened up about her regrets, where she currently stands with Melissa and the twins, and what to expect the rest of the season!
AllAboutTRH: Is being on the show everything you expected?
Amber Marchese: No. I knew there was drama, I just didn’t think it was..I don’t know. I thought it would be all fun and games I was going to come into the show, I was going on with my girlfriends, and I really felt we would have a blast! Here we had this opportunity to be on TV, show our families off, and show the world how much fun we could have and it didn’t end up like that at all! People can be very manipulative, very cruel. I just feel like the show has the ability to catch the beauty in people and the downright ugly.
Have you remained friends with the ladies since filming?
I talk to Dina, I talk to Teresa (Giudice), we will catch up once in awhile. Dina is like Mama Dina to me, you know, if I have something about the show she’s always there to talk me through it and you know she has experienced a lot of it. Same with Teresa. She’s been through hell from just the past shows and her personal life and the legal issues. She always reminds me that no matter how bad it got for me it wasn’t my family. Which is true. I can go home to my family and it’s not like my sister-in-law is doing something to me.
Speaking of that, you were once friends with Melissa right? Back in the day?
Yes, you know. Yes. Back in my 20s. And I’m not saying I’m not friends with Melissa now, I am just definitely not as trusting with her now.
Were you hoping the show would bring you two back together?
I was definitely hoping that her and I would have each other’s backs. I am a firm believer that longevity in a friendship means something and she knows me from my 20s, she should have my back and I should have her back. We never argued or fought and I never saw Melissa do any type of manipulations or gossiping behind someones back. We always got along very well in our 20s, I am just disappointed in the way it all unraveled with her.
So speaking on that, basically the talking behind people’s backs and gossiping, what do you think of Melissa telling the twins about the conversation you two had in the car?
In my opinion if Melissa was so concerned about the twins and had such an awful conscious than she should have came back to me and said “You know what Amber, I don’t like how you did this, maybe you shouldn’t have done that, let’s go talk to the twins and give the twins an opportunity to hear the rumors and find out exactly who said it” It wasn’t me! I said through the grapevine. The grapevine is not gospel, it’s what people said. I just think Melissa could have handled this so much differently, she knew what she was doing. She knew she was causing trouble and saw how enraged they were, stealing clothes from the store and sitting outside of my house. Why not just call me for coffee? Just call me up! Nicole could have come to my house and we could have talked about it.
How has this situation affected the friendship between Jim and Bobby? Are they still friends?
Jim will never speak to Bobby again. We saw a side of Bobby that we don’t ever want to be faced with again. There has been complete disloyalty and distrust and he really screwed us. You have to understand, Jim didn’t even want to be a part of the show. I dragged him into this and he did something for me. And actually he did that scene for Bobby, so he [Bobby] could have more airtime. That scene was only supposed to be about Jim and the kids. Bobby then took what he said – which wasn’t even all that bad – he didn’t say mean things, he wasn’t cruel. He never met the Joe’s at all. So for Bobby to take the words Jim said and tell Rino and he tells the guys and Bobby just stands there, it’s just not right. And then the fact Bobby knew how mad the twins were about this. I even said to Bobby I knew something was wrong because they weren’t picking up my phone calls and he said “Well you’re just going to have to deal with it.”
So you have answered this question several times, however it has been asked a lot. Obviously Jim felt some discomfort when it came to hanging out with the Joes. Knowing he would have to interact with them why would he decide to join the show? Yes. This was my dream, you know to be on TV and this is what I get. I feel bad because Jim is getting hurt for something I pushed and I wanted. He’s trying to make me happy and this is what happened. He lost his best friend and now his name is getting dragged through the mud. I owe him a lot of sex! (laughs)
So has he warmed up to the Giudices at all? Or does he feel any negative feelings towards your relationship with Teresa?
Not at all! He never had anything bad to say about Joe Giudice or Teresa, he thinks that they are good people! I mean it’s tough to watch now because Joe was talking trash behind his back without even knowing Jim, but at the end of the day he thinks they are very kind and he knows the kind of relationship I have with Teresa and he supports it. You have to understand he made a professional judgement call. He just thought it was not in their best interest nor his best interest to be in a social setting with alcohol and drinks, he didn’t want to put anyone in that position and that is his decision! Everyone should just respect it. It’s not like he said he didn’t want to be around them forever. He wanted to wait until things settled. At the time they hadn’t put in their plea yet it was still an open case. While it’s an open case anything can be brought into court, anything. Jim just didn’t want to be put in that position.
Do you have any regrets since being on the show since it has aired?
No, I mean I don’t regret anything. I just wish I would have told Jim definitely not to be anywhere near any of the filming. I think if anything I should have listened to Jim and respected the fact that he didn’t want to film and not push that. I really regret that. I regret bringing Jim onto this show on any level. I can handle it! I don’t like how vicious it is. People are vicious. It’s hard for me to wrap my arms around that.
Do you feel that you were ambushed or ganged up on at the First Responder’s Party?
I feel like I was absolutely ambushed. At the time you have to understand I had no idea why they were even mad. And their way, their forceful way, I am not going to back down. I’m going to stand my ground I don’t care who is coming at me. If you are coming into my personal space you better be careful.
Do you feel like your relationship with the twins and Melissa, even just the trust with her, could be mended in the future or maybe at the reunion?
With Melissa, I didn’t notice while we were fighting, how much Melissa was sticking up for me in that moment. You know how she said to the twins, “Oh no she didn’t call you a whore”, and I think she also said to the twins, “Why are you all of a sudden going right to a negative way?”, like she was saying this to the twins. It kind of gave me hope that yes Melissa might have jumped the gun by telling them and for definite insincere reasons, but I don’t think she realized what she was doing and the outcome it was going to have. Any rational person would have talked it out. And you know what? I would have said sorry. I shouldn’t have said a darn thing I’m sorry! …Even though it’s true! I wasn’t lying, no one ever lied. What I truly feel is, I normally don’t judge people, but physically attacking someone over something I know to be true is offensive to me. I don’t know if she wants to beat up Colts Neck and all of the surrounding areas because they are saying this about her? I didn’t say anything that she hadn’t already heard previously.
As far as the twins go, honestly, I don’t they’re bright enough to move on and say, okay it’s a show we were heated, we got caught up I’m sorry let’s move on. They’re not that type of people.
How was it coming in as a new Housewife? Were Melissa, Teresa and Dina welcoming or was it difficult to join the group?
I think they’re tough. I think first of all Teresa was very preoccupied with her personal issues at home and I think the girls are just tough in general. I definitely took some notes from those girls.
Who would you say is the most authentic housewife on and off camera? Who is the least?
Can I say me? (laughs) I know this sounds cliche! But I feel like I do my best to stay true to myself whether the cameras are on or not. I will say, I do know the twins and Nicole is different with each person in general. She is one way with the guys, one way with the girls, and who is not different is Teresa (Aprea). She’s just miserable all the time. So she was authentic. Dina I feel like has two different personalities, Melissa does too, and Teresa doesn’t count because she was focusing on her personal issues.
Do you feel like Melissa’s personality is different on camera than the Melissa you have known for the past 10 years?
You are seeing a hardened version of her. She was definitely more light-hearted and easygoing, and less manipulative. I think she knows how to work people, to me she was the puppeteer for the twins.
The First Responder’s Party was definitely the first major drama this season, should viewers be expecting more of the drama?
There is going to be some more light-hearted moments, and also there is also something big that goes on with me and my five-year mark. A lot of things for breast cancer, it was a tough time, it really was a tough time so you are going to see things happen with that. And then there is also a lot of drama! A lot more drama – but it doesn’t involve any more physical altercation with me!
I loved the honesty and emotion Amber had when sharing each of her experiences on the show; she is not one to hide behind her feelings which is a respectful quality. It seems like she has hope for her relationship with Melissa and does seem like a loyal friend. I’m excited to see the rest of the drama unfold for Amber and the other ladies this season!
What are your thoughts on the AllAboutTRH interview with Amber Marchese?