Marlo Hampton Issues An Apology For Using Gay Slur

January 31, 2012 | By | 38 Replies Continue Reading

For those of you who didn’t see, Marlo Hampton fought with RHOA star Sheree Whitfield on their South Africa trip and used a gay slur which was very offensive to many of us watching. Marlo randomly said, “That’s why don’t have a man! Go and hang with them fag**s with your ugly ass.” Marlo has issued an statement on her official website saying,

I would like to offer from the bottom of my heart the fullest and most heartfelt apology for my recent use of an anti-gay slur. When I used this word, I was not mindful of the demeaning connotation that this has in the gay community. My speech was irresponsible, thoughtless and said with the intention of conveying anger rather than as a statement on my feelings towards the gay community as a whole.

My first action, after the incident was to contact my closest friend and assistant of 8 years and to confess what I had done, to express my sadness and regret, and to ask him for his forgiveness. I was devastated at the thought of having hurt or embarrassed him as well as any member of the gay community and relish this opportunity to publicly apologize. My friends have embraced me, supported me, withheld judgment of me and have meant a lot to me over the years. I would never abuse their kindness and friendship and would never want to hurt them or demean them in any way.

I applaud and admire this community for their triumph over a sometimes harsh, mean spirited society that discriminates and even violently attacks those who are different. These are obstacles that I relate to and that I have been inspired by them to overcome. I celebrate this community and am saddened by any indication otherwise, that my actions may have caused.

I look forward to continuing to build my strong relationship with you, my followers and supporters, and those of you who do not yet know me and my heart. I look forward to work to regain your trust, respect and your love which has so empowered me over the years. I also thank you for allowing me to address you personally and to let you know how deeply sorry I am.

For those of you who didn’t see the clip click here to watch

Do you buy it? Thoughts?

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Category: RHOA, Sheree Whitfield

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Comments (38)

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  1. PandaBear says:

    Puh-lease…she wasn’t mindful of the connotation of the word, really? She could have cursed Sheree up down and sideways without using that word. She DID target gay men with the word.

    Wondering why she isn’t being held at the same standard as Joe Giudice or Danielle’s mini-thug (I forget his name) by using such language. Out of the 3 hers was the most vicious.

    • Kija says:

      If she didn’t know what the word meant, then in what context did she mean Sheree should keeping hanging out with men that slur applied to? Did she mean personal trainers? I don’t think that fits Lawrence, he’s not a personal trainer? No, she knew what it meant.

      The apology overall is quite complete, but is totally invalidated by beginning it with a lie.

  2. Mila says:

    This is total BS. Marlo better not be on the next season especially after this. I guarantee you she’s at her house saying the word after every other word. I don’t BUY it

  3. Claire says:

    Shame on marlo. She is definetly not going to be asked to come back next season

  4. reddvette says:

    Did is bullshe-out! Marlo meant for it to be a slur. Other wise she would have called Sheree a fa….t. Which in street slang also means weak. Thats not what she did, and she knows it, just don’t think others know the difference. Yes, she is worse than the others, because she has used voilence. They were were being blowhards.

  5. Dill says:

    I forgive her, she apologized and that is what makes her different from Joe G. or Danielle’s friend, and her apology was heartfelt. Everybody says things out of anger, they are not always recorded and played back. Most people never apologize for their words even when they are publicly exposed. Marlo is new to the reality show set up and I don’t think that she meant any harm by it, (clearly it was hurtful to a lot of people), clearly she did recognize a mistake and if it happens again, well that’s another story. Personally I thought her etiquette rules were more offensive (and this is coming from a gay person)

    • DJ says:

      Dill,
      You seem like a very good, genuine person, and I wish I could be as forgiving as you. Gay people have been persecuted since the beginning of time, and people should not get off so easily by just saying “sorry” for using such a disgusting, vile word. Marlo needs to face repercussions for her actions. Bravo should not ask her back.

      • Whitegirl1 says:

        This bitch ain’t sorry, she’s sorry she got caught! Marlo said go hang with them faggots! I think that was a direct attack on Lawrence and what ever friend Shree was visiting in Africa, did Marlo apologize to Shree’s gay friends ? Next week she’s gonna tell NeNe, Shree needs to google her assault charges’s and the victim had committed suicide before this comment had been made. Marlo is a big mouth stupid ass bitch that needs to continue her life as a bed warmer off T.V.

        • ATL gal says:

          Marlo and Lawrence are best friends, girl. I’ve met Lawrence and he himself calls certain people “queens” on the regular. So…don’t get offended for Lawrence’s sake lol

          • Dill says:

            THANK YOU!!!!!!

            Its so important for people not to start alienating Marlo, because I don’t think she targeted gay people. She defiantly deserves a second chance, and I feel very firm about that too (that’s why I keep coming back to this entry lol) If she had said something like “gays shouldn’t get married” or “being gay is a choice” and she were to start questioning the whole community, again, that would be different. But she used a bad word (in all honesty who doesn’t use a bad word when they are mad)

            also regarding her being taken off the show……what kind of message does that send?

            When somebody realizes their mistakes and apologizes and grows from it is not the time to shut somebody up.

          • orestes says:

            There is a HUGE difference between calling someone a queen or a faggot. As a gay man, I do not condone anyone using the latter term. In addition, context matters. The point of her comment and the tone was to denigrate Sheree by reference to her hanging out with gay men. It is perfectly clear what she meant by the comment and her press repped dissembling doesn’t change that.

    • Dill says:

      If I chased down or got infuriated everytime somebody used anti-gay slang towards me, I would lead a pretty miserable life. I truly feel that if somebody (Marlo in this case) offers up an apology you gotta take it. If you fight with somebody and put them down for righting their wrongs and apologizing, it starts a war. If the viewers keep slapping her down for this remark its like why would it stop her from doing it again, I feel that if we acknowledge that we appreciate her apology (regardless of how genuine or disingenuous you may feel it was) it will encourage her to stick up for gay rights in the future. People do learn from their mistakes.

      • DJ says:

        Dill,
        Kudos. Good attitude…. You will live longer… less stress for you. I just get especially angry because my brother and Uncle are gay. I will try to follow your lead…

        Now Roxy had to get on the story that Ted Turner is Marlo’s Big Poppa!!!!

      • ATL gal says:

        This is smart! It’s called positive reinforcement. And it works. If you punish good behavior (the apology) what do you expect will happen?

        Smart Dill.

      • orestes says:

        I’m all for forgiveness, too. However, any apology I accept must be sincere. For her to claim that she did not realize that faggot was a slur is dishonest. No one in the US doesn’t know that. Had she said that she was angry and said something that she shouldn’t have because it is not accurate reflection of her atitudes or that in her desire to attack Sheree she attacked another group, then perhaps she is worthy of forgiveness. But this contrivance does not convince.

        To offer the counterargument, if any apology is enough to overcome an expression of hostility towards a group, what is the incentive to change that attitude? Is saying, oh, I didn’t mean anything bad by calling someone a faggot, nigger, kike, etc., a sufficient apology?

        • Dill says:

          I just feel that it might be too early for us (as a whole, obviously everybody is entitled to what they believe) to tell if her apology is sincere. I know her choice of words was harsh/brash/uncalled for, etc., and that even her apology is a bit too politically correct but for me I feel I that it really is too soon to tell if her apology is sincere or not. Just for the simple fact that actions speak much louder than words, so if she really is sorry (as she stated) she will continue to educate herself about the misuse of language that she used and she will start to rally for the LGBT community and perhaps start to get get involved. I just have a strong feeling that she will from the fact that now she is put in a sort of deadlock where she has to prove her words were really how she feels. It’s like how I feel towards anybody who uses derogatory language, if they mean that they are sorry, it’s not the instant apology that really means the most, it’s the aftermath and the way they show that they are sorry (by really getting to know the history behind the insult they spew).

          I just in a way want to keep her around because she is a loud person, and her words are definitely heard (I mean look at this blog entry for example). So if she can use her voice now for better uses, I really think we should give her the chance. We might have a lot to gain from her.

    • ATL gal says:

      I agree with you. Coming from someone who hangs with a lot of gays (some friends, messy frienemies lol) this word is batted around a lot, CK Louis style. I don’t use it. But have heard it used many times by both orientations and accepted. It’s usually in teasing or insulting way, but not as a hate-slur. This is how I see her intention- to be hurtful. This doesn’t excuse it, not at all. The girl was dead wrong! But I do believe she is sorry. And she supports a lot of gay events in ATL and call many her friends. Actions speak louder than words, imo. I wish she had chosen her words better but she’s not that kinda girl, apparently. And THAT is whole ‘nother story!

  6. Rach says:

    Bullshit. I think she meant exactly what she said and she’s apologizing because she wants to be a housewife next season.

  7. DJ says:

    OMG!!!! It is all over the internet the Marlo’s sugar daddy is TED TURNER and that is why him and Jane Fonda got Divorced? WTF!!!

  8. mm says:

    The offensive sentence and the apology are so different in style I have to wonder how much she paid to have the apology written for her. It is a work of art.

  9. CHASE says:

    This is complete BS! This is an uneducated women who will do and say anything to become relivent on this tv show. Even if that means discriminating and demeaning a group of people (because at least then she’s being talked about). I wonder how big of a rampage she would be on or how forgiving she would be, if lets say hypothetically, Kim used the “N” word in the way she used the “F” word? She would be trashing Kim from china & back and wouldn’t give a damn if she apologized! I hope on the reunion Andy Cohen lets her HAVE IT! Because she sure treated Terrsa Giudice like crap for her husband saying “Gaylord” (which isn’t even a slurr and also Tre wasn’t even the one who said it!). I hope Bravo thinks very carefully about adding a cast member who is so prejudice!

    • ATL gal says:

      You really think ni**er is the same as fa**ot don’t you? SMH

      • Chase says:

        To a gay person, yes. Prejudice is prejudice plain and simple. Are you implying that one group of people’s struggles are more important then others? Wow, how uneducated of you.

        • Chase says:

          Let me re-phrase that. Not to ALL gay people, the same way i know some african americans who don’t sweat the N word. But to the ones who do take it to heart, yes it is offensive & why are you trying to dictate which is a more important slur? Honey your one of the problem with this country, hate is hate wether its directed towards whites/blacks/gays/heteros/ etc…who cares which is worse? WHY CANT YOU JUST SUPPORT STOPPING IT ALL INSTEAD OF HAVING A CONTEST FOR WHICH IS MOST DISCRIMINATORY?….shame.

  10. Kija says:

    Her apology was clearly written by her publicist. It sounds like publicist speak and has that carefully laundered, rinsed and ironed before wearing sound to it. And as fulsome as it is, it begins with a lie which makes it worthless as an apology. She used the slur in the context of the slur’s commonly understood meaning. If she were unaware of its meaning, she would have not have used it “correctly” in her sentence. It is also clear that she knows the meaning because Sheree does hang out with gay men a lot. Apologies that start with a lie are worthless, no matter how many pretty words are used to bedazzle it.

  11. sarah says:

    Noticed how she bought up her “gay” assistant…she is full of shit and I hope karma bites her in the ass…the media doesn’t have to twist any story to make her look bad…the simple facts(aka police reports and the shit that comes outta her mouth) do that all by itself

  12. Salmon Cakes says:

    Goon:From Urban Dictionary

    Someone hired to bully another or rough someone up (Bravo paid for the trip, so close enough) usually someone big ( she’s 5′ 10″ ) and dumb (clearly) who commits acts of violence ( see 7 priors) for money.

  13. ATL gal says:

    I don’t think Marlo was ever going to be a housewife, I think that was all hype. Bravo never said she was and she was only ever shown to as a “friend”.

    She is also not a housewife, not married, no kids. And Andy has said after Bethanny he wouldn’t do that anymore.

    So, I don’t think she did it to try and get in his good graces. I think she did it to repair her personal relationships with friends and family that might have been affected and when you make a mistake that is what you do: try and make restitution. I’m glad she apologized and I’m fairly certain she won’t be saying that word anymore.

  14. jam jam says:

    i stopped reading it after the 3rd sentence….i have a couple words for marlow…..shut your irrelevant ass up! the gay community probably doesnt care what some prostitute tranny thinks anyway

  15. Dill says:

    this is definatley a disagree to agree types of situations. I just wish people could give Marlo another chance……but they clearly can’i; Get of of her case its not nice. Let her apologize and let her take actions to prove it. Because my thought on this remains, she should not be removed from the housewives, she should instead become more proficient in the LGBT community.

  16. can her ass says:

    dear andy, please can, marlo hampton ass, off your network as gay person you should understand the problem gay people face day in dayout soo you don,t need this hood rat to success in your real housewifes series ,p.s do it for the little fat gay kid that gets picked on in school every day .thankyou mr andy c,

  17. HEARTS says:

    MARLO BETTER NOT BE ASKED TO COME BACK TO THE NEXT SEASON. SHE IS DISRESPECTFUL, NOT ONLY TO THE GAY COMMUNITY BUT ALSO TO THOSE WHO ARE A BIT DIFFERENT FROM HER ( PLS REFER TO HER TRIP TO CAPETOWN). HER MANNERISM IS AWFUL. SHE WAS NEVER INVITED TO THIS TRIP YET CONSTANTLY WANTS TO BE THE FIRST TO CHOOSE HER ROOM AND CONTINUES TO MAKE UNREALISTIC DEMANDS. SHE LACKS CLASS AND SHOWED HERSELF TO BE ONE UNGRATEFUL AND IGNORANT WOMAN!

  18. Chris says:

    Her apology was NOT sincere, there is nothing about her that is real or sincere. If she becomes a housewife on this show, I will not watch any longer. This slur, as bad as it was, is not the most disgusting thing about her. There is nothing pleasant, attractive, nice about her. Who needs this trash talking nobody on this show.

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