Roxanne 
Last week on Real Housewives of Miami we left off with Adriana and Lea squaring off in the Miami storm about their ill-fated friendship. We pick up where we left off last week, but things do not get better. Lisa is unaware of this meeting and decides to have a girls night, which blows up in her face! Let’s get to recapping…
So Adriana and Lea are in the pouring rain attempting to hash things out. Or are they? Lea is clearly very hurt by Adriana, who she helped as a single mom with school tuition and what not. While I was upset with Lea last week for throwing Adriana’s financial struggles out into the open, I can see why she would feel the need to get defensive.
Lea is hurt that Adriana did not stand up against Ana with her last season. Adriana then claims Lea chose Joanna’s (or should I say, HO-anna?) side instead of hers and replaced her. Lea then asks Adriana why she is so jealous of Joanna and Adriana just isn’t having this, leading her to storm off in a dramatic and over the top way that only a Miami Housewife can pull off.
We then catch up with Joanna and Romain at a tennis match. The lovebirds are planning their wedding but there is a serious issue. There seems to be a lack of intimacy and I doubt Romain is impotent, they just aren’t into each other! Romain says he just needs a new sauce with his pasta. Gross and weird. Is this how marriage is?
Over to Alexia, she seems to be the Jacqueline Laurita of RHOM using her children’s misfortunes and obstacles as her ticket to a Bravo paycheck. Her son Frankie is recording rap music to help his speech therapy, even though she might not agree with some of the lyrics.
She later consults with her mother and thinks her older son Peter needs therapy to help him face his demons. He’s been acting out since Frankie’s brain injury due to a car accident, and Alexia is torn about what to do to help both of her sons now. She thinks being married to a drug lord and having that as a father is causing Peter to view himself as a “bad seed” and then act on that.
Over at the House Built by Boobs, Lisa is getting ready for bed with her hubby, Lenny. They are the cutest together and I love seeing them. Lisa talks about being worked up due to her infertility issues. Lenny suggests a surrogate but Lisa wants to carry her children herself. She also has invited the ladies to a girls night out in the town while Lenny is at a bachelor party.
Lea meets with Alexia, who is upset with Lea for saying Peter should have gotten jail time for punching a homeless man in the private area. Lea denies saying any of this and reminds us she is pro-youth and all for second chances, etc. Alexia seems scared of Lea and I don’t even know why. Of course, in her interview she unleashes and is anti-Lea, but not to her face.
Meanwhile, Adriana and Marysol are hanging out and soaking up the sun. Marysol opens up to Adriana about Mama Elsa’s struggle. Adriana misses Elsa, who she also loves as a mom. Marysol says Elsa wanted to be a part of Adriana’s wedding planning but because of her health, she can’t. She has given Marysol her wedding shawl to give Adriana, which is easily the most touching moment of this entire show! God bless Mama Elsa.
It’s time for Lisa’s girls night out and it starts off being all fun and games. Lea, Lisa and Joanna meet up first and are having a great time. Let me just say it’s hilarious the way Lea looks with the two blonde bombshells. Is she the chaperone?!
Things quickly go sour when Marysol arrives with Alexia and Adriana. Nobody is happy to see anybody else given all their bad blood at the moment. Lisa did not know that Lea and Adriana had just had a big blow up, and she just wanted to be the peacemaker bringing the group back together for at least one night!
Not so fast. Lea (or Grim Reaper?) exits the bar because she senses the “mean girl” vibe from the latinas. She goes outside and is crying to her husband Roy on the phone about how Adriana acts like she doesn’t know her and Marysol is being a bitch and what not.
Joanna and Lisa come to check up on Lea. Lisa encourages Lea to come back in and just enjoy a night out and ignore the drama! Forget the haters! Lea refuses. She says she is hurt by Marysol and Adriana and wants to go. Lisa continues to try to be peacemaker and Joanna makes a bitch comment about how Lisa should have a baby already so she stops mothering them. Wow! Again with the infertility low blows?!
Lisa tries to give Adriana the benefit of the doubt regarding this whole legal marriage nonsense, but Joanna magically whips out the marriage certificate from her purse and shows it to Lisa, showing that Adriana in fact got a license then went back a month later to get MARRIED.
Next week, Lisa will confront Adriana about this all, and it looks like Adriana spins and twists and lies and tries to deny yet again. Joanna and Adriana’s drama will trickle down to Romain and Frederic and Adriana will sling some mud, accusing Romain of cheating with a Colombian, his ex-wife perhaps?
Let’s discuss the episode! Are you on Lea’s, Adriana’s, or nobody’s side here? Are they all just crazy and forcing drama for their season?
